Growing Pains

"It is so hard when sincere prayer about something we desire very much is not answered the way we want. It is especially difficult when the Lord answers no to that which is WORTHY and would give us great JOY and HAPPINESS...it seems reasonable and so consistent with our happiness to have a favorable answer. It is hard to understand why our exercise of deep and sincere faith from an obedient life does not bring the desired result...

If all matters were immediately resolved at your first petition, you could not grow. Your Father in Heaven and His beloved Son love you PERFECTLY. They would not require you to experience a moment  more of difficulty than is absolutely needed for your personal benefit or for that of those you love." -Elder Richard G. Scott

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1995/10/trust-in-the-lord?lang=eng#watch=video

I guess this is what we call growing pains.

<3 Christine Marie

Words of Advice From My Midget

I have a baby sister who is two years younger and three inches taller, though she will forever be my "midge". We have grown increasingly closer through the years and though we live together, we rarely see each other. Often, the only times in which we are home at the same time, one of us in the shower. So after a few cups of ice water have been thrown over the top of the shower curtain, the bearing of souls begins.

I was explaining some feelings that I have been having and how I wish things could be different. Then, my cute little midget who is not-so-little-anymore hit me with the most profound statement.

"The part that hurts the most is that they change the love they felt for you into something hateful and angry,"

This is fascinating, frustrating and futile for my brain. I am able to forgive quickly and, perhaps, this trait has also become a burden when balancing relationships. As mentioned before, I don’t get over people and I like to keep people; not in a creepy I-drive-past-your-house-to-see-if-you-have-a-special-guest sort of way but more like I-always-want-to-remember-eating-Wheaties-and-laughing-at-your-bedhead type of way. My journal is a littering of pictures, texts, inside jokes and memories that have become a part of who I am. I can't seem to erase these people from my life. It kills to think I have been erased from theirs. 

I understand that people move on, we must all heal and do so in our ways but I cannot help but miss the friendship shared. When I think back to any relationship I want to remember the good, smile at the moments, and thank the heavens that we found each other. 

looking back, 

Christine Marie